Humor Articles
196: Do You Force The Forces Of Motivation
Motivation comes in different shapes and sizes. Before Abraham Lincoln was elected president, he lost seven elections for public office. Thomas Edison tried over 2,000 experiments before he got his light bulb to work. Col. Sanders was rejected by over 1,000 restaurants before he found one interested in his secret recipe. Obviously, to be successful
197: Do You Get Lost Following Recipes
I grew up without a recipe for marriage. Before I eloped I asked my mother how to turn over an egg without breaking the yolk. Frankly, I'm not sure she knew. The women in my family are known for cooking up reasons to go out to eat - but I digress. My mother said if John complained about a broken yolk, our marriage would be in trouble. Well, we've m
198: Do You Get What You Pay For
Although getting what you pay for is a truism that's withstood time, we keep trying to get more than we pay for. We buy on sale, at discount and in bulk. We use coupons and accumulate frequent flyer miles. Nevertheless, profit margins are rarely marginal. Even going out of business sales make money. When my sons were growing up, I thought they'd pu
199: Do You Give Yourself Credit
Once upon a time, not too long ago, my husband thought I had too many credit cards - especially for clothing shops and department stores. John thought having so many credit cards could discredit our credit.
I charged salon services, movie tickets and luncheons with friends - which seem to cost more than lunches. Anyway ... John thought the only
200: Do You Have Time For Time Management
I learned about time management from the White Rabbit in Alice in Wonderland. Now I'm the one running around yelling, "I'm late. I'm late - for a very important date".
I remember when stores were closed on Sundays and holidays. Now we White Rabbits have stores open 24/7, one-day dry cleaning and 24-hour news stations. I don't need appointments
201: Do You Know How Generous You Are
Driving the carpool for another parent or loaning a friend money for a taxi - these are acts of kindness, otherwise known as favors. However, there is another kind of favor - the unintentional kind.
While I was driving to work, people who sell gas, tires and cars were on the receiving end of my previously unrecognized kindness. They all profite
202: Do You Know How To Speak Spa-Nish
Belgium is the birthplace of the spa. It's also the land of rich chocolates. To me that says heaven. To my pocketbook it says a Hershey Bar on the way to "Spas R Us".
Once a month I have a facial at Spas R US. My face is bathed in warm vapors, kneaded with various oils, exfoliated with an herbal mask and wrapped in cool towels. My grandmother d
203: Do You Know The Reason
Supposedly there's a reason for everything. If there is, I must have had a case of the "reverse Midas touch" yesterday. Whatever I touched turned to fool's gold. I stained a window shade trying to clean it, I broke the kitchen scale by dropping it on the floor and I scratched the dining room tile by moving chairs.
Supposedly things happen in th
204: Do You Look A Gift Horse In The Mouth
When it comes to gift buying, "Be careful what they ask for - you might have to shop for it". I avoid this problem. I don't ask family and friends what they want for birthdays or for Christmas. By doing this I avoid having to shop for things like "a light, blue sweater - but not too light blue; with pretty buttons; machine washable; and in a size s
205: Do You Take Personal Development Personally
Some aspects of my personal development have developed unexplainably slowly. Why did I wait so long to appreciate naps? Naps revitalize me more than energy drinks and they're more luxurious than bubble baths. Oh, now I remember why I didn't take naps. I didn't have time.
Facials are another luxury I postponed too long. Why did I postpone having
206: Do You Take This Man
Elopement is a gift a couple gives themselves. My sister had a large wedding, but I'm not sure she enjoyed it. Just as she was relaxing into fun mode, it was time to take pictures, greet guests, have the first dance, cut the cake, etc, etc, etc.
Instead, John and I eloped. No flowers, music, wedding gown or tuxedo. His best man was my man of h
207: Do You Talk To Talk Radio
Maybe it's because I grew up in a house full of women, but I'm a talk radio junkie. Music channels don't sooth my savage beast. Music doesn't quiet my thoughts - no matter how loud it is - even teenager loud.
I want a combination of news, weather, interviews and humor. A little bit of sugar helps medicine go down and humor makes it possible to
208: Do You Walk The Walk
Everyone agrees walking is good for us. Unfortunately, not everyone agrees about how much is good. Some say thirty minutes three or four times a week. Others say every day. Some say you should move at fifty-five percent of your maximum heart rate. Others say you should take ten thousand steps. I'm sure that improved pedometer sales, but I'm hyperac
209: Do You Want To Bet It Hasn t Changed
When I wasn't looking, someone put a "Do Not Disturb" sign on Las Vegas. It's no longer family friendly. The money Mom and Dad were spending on wizard hats and amusement park rides wasn't being spent in casinos, which spin, roll and throw much greater profits.
New luxury hotels appear overnight like mushrooms and service staff are cloned to run
210: Does A Face-Lift Make You Taller
My grandmother believed in face-lifts - as long as they didn't require surgery. She believed a smile improved everyone's looks.
Most women, however, use lipstick to improve their looks. That's why lipstick is the most frequently purchased beauty product - except by me. I don't wear lipstick. I don't have the patience to reapply it. For me lipst
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