Humor Articles
286: Is It All In The Name
I have one of those names. Because it's unusual, I have to spell it for people. If it's in person, I hand them my ID. If it's over the phone, I handle my patience. When things come in the mail, Knight is always spelled right; but there's still a problem. Often the mail is addressed to Mr. Knight Pierce Hirst.
When it comes to boys, there are lo
287: Is It Coincidence Marriage Contains The Words I Age
A funny thing happened on the way through our marriage. John and I have reached a state of contentedly happy companionship. The excitement of new love has matured.
When we were newlyweds, I didn't make dinner until John got home. A few years later life and children got in the way and I kept his dinner warm. Now if John comes home late, his dinn
288: Is It Music To Your Ears
I don't listen to music unless I'm somewhere it's played for the masses - like supermarkets or shopping malls, places where pop songs are meant to sooth us savage beasts and keep us shopping. I'm a talk radio junkie. The only time I turn my radio to a music station is at Christmas.
Christmas carols fill me with feelings of peace on earth, good
289: Is It Plane Plain Or Pain
As a child traveling by plane was exciting, but somewhere between then and now it turned into plain travel and plain travel turned into pain travel.
Of course, if it's hard for you to meet people, air travel's for you. The cramped seating conditions provide you an opportunity to be close to two other people in your row, as well as three people
290: Is It Really As Good For The Gander
When I got married, I got a life partner. My husband got a housekeeper and a cook. He also got a laundress and a social secretary. After we had children he got a nanny to take care of them - a nanny who didn't get days off. This explains why men remarry sooner after divorce. Unfortunately, second marriages are statistically less successful than fir
291: Is It Really What It Seems
Things aren't always what they seem. False advertising is against the law, but companies do it all the time. According to the sign at my gas station, gas costs $3.54 AND nine-tenth cent per gallon. Not so. Because there's no one-tenth cent coin to be given in change, it's actually $3.55 per gallon. And because there's no one-tenth cent coin, I can'
292: Is It Spelled Vacation Or Vaca-Shun
I don't know about you, but I need a vacation. It doesn't have to be at an exotic location. It doesn't have to be break-the-bank expensive. I just need to get away so I can appreciate what I have when I come back. What I have might be a little dustier, but I'll appreciate it more.
The last trip I remember taking was on the ripped carpet. What I
293: Is It The Holidze Again
The time from Thanksgiving through New Year's should be called the "holidaze". Invitations to drop by, invitations for cocktails, invitations for dinner - I'm holidazed by it all.
What to wear? Several years ago I decided to simplify my life by wearing black - solids, prints, stripes - basically black. Because of this decision I don't have a ho
294: Is It To Die For
My grandmother didn't understand why people described things as "to die for". She thought something really liked should be something "to live for" - like chocolate.
Chocolate is a socially acceptable addiction. It's a multi-sensory addiction that appeals to taste, smell and touch. Because it also releases chemicals similar to those released whe
295: Is It Written In The Stars
I want to believe in astrology. I want to believe what I do is predetermined by someone or something that knows more about life than I do. Okay, I just want parts of my life predetermined - like yesterday's speeding ticket. I want my husband to believe it was predetermined too.
Yes, there are times I'd like to go through life on cruise control
296: Is Late Always Better Than Never
When a project's finished months after its completion date or a debt's repaid long after it was due or a guest arrives hours after expected, we tell ourselves better late than never. But is it?
Passengers on the Titanic, who might have been late arriving for their voyage, would have preferred to have never arrived at the dock. I don't want the G
297: Is Life A Party Waiting To Happen
Parties are meant to be fun; but when I open an invitation, I hear my grandmother saying, "Every invitation accepted is a party promised". It's hard to open an invitation with my fingers crossed.
What do I wear when the invitation says "casual chic"? That's an invitation to Judgment Day. No matter what I wear, there'll be an invisible sign acro
298: Is Nostalgia A Sugar-Coated Memory
Nostalgia is a longing for something far away or long gone - like the good old days. People talk fondly about times when things weren't rushed or stressed or expensive. Maybe absence makes the heart grow fonder - and the memory hazier. Back then - whenever then was - people didn't rush as much because they didn't have as many places to go. They str
299: Is Not Celebrating Birthdays A Birthright
I have friends who have stopped celebrating their birthdays. My grandmother wouldn't have approved. She lived to be ninety-one and she celebrated every one of those ninety-one years. Granted, some years were better than others; but she'd ask me if I knew how many people in the cemetery would like to be her age. The answer, of course, was all of the
300: Is Progress Our Most Important Product
Okay. I admit it. I'm electronically challenged. I have trouble using an electric can opener, an electric pencil sharpener - even an electric toothbrush.
My husband, on the other hand - the hand holding a fistful of extension cords - loves electronic gadgets. It's a guy thing, which I'm sure Freud would have said related somehow to a man's rela
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